No sleep...

So today has been a rough day. I barely slept last night. I couldn't stop thinking about everything and anything. Everyday I'm reminded that I think WAY too much and I need to calm the fuck down and take shit one thing at a time. I just get far too head of myself and get overwhelmed.  FUCKING BRAIN!! MAY ZOMBIES NOM THEE!!

One of my biggest fears about the sewing is I'll lose my passion for it. I'll get burnt out from it and start to hate it. Designing things and bringing them to life is... it's a pretty special feeling. Especially when you are able to get your vision or recreation out pretty damn perfect. One of the best and most motivating things for me and making something for someone you love and getting to watch them enjoy it. Knowing you've made someone you love happy with something you've created is the most rewarding part of it.  That's what keeps my doing what I do. So it makes me wonder if I would get burnt out from making clothing and costumes for a bunch of stranger whom may or may not appreciate my work. Would be a kick in the teeth to know it's just getting tossed around and disregarded like a piece of shit.  To have your work unappreciated.. Shit like would kill the love for it.

So then it makes me wonder if I should just leave it as a hobby, are still with costume designing. Because at least with that, there is the research of creating the right costume needed and it's always something different. Not just making the same shirt over and over again or something like that. I like the idea of creating a one of a kind piece that may or may not take a while and moving on to other projects.

I've always dabbled in the idea of unique clothing. One of a kind garments and sell them off. At these then if someone sees it and really likes it and WANTS to buy it... you still have the satisfaction of making someone happy and your work is appreciated. I can get the art perspective in there as well. So I'd think it would be harder to get burnt out from doing shit like that. I'm thinking that is more my path. I like getting a sudden idea for a design and working them out to make them.